Thursday, June 08, 2006

the "what planet am I on?" news roundup

From start to finish, June 7 2006 was a day when I literally couldn't believe the news I was reading and hearing. It started with American Morning and a story that nearly caused me to burn myself with the iron. Unfortunately, that segment of the show is the only one that hasn't been transcripted on the website, but you can read about the story in The Kansas City Star.

The short-lived gay marriage debate in the U.S. Senate provided this little gem from an incredibly hateful man:
SEN. RICK SANT0RUM (R), PENNSYLVANIA: If marriage is not about one man and one woman for the purpose of a relationship of which to have children and continue the society, then... if it's about two women or two men, why not two women and three men? Why not whatever arrangement? If gender doesn't matter anymore, why does number matter? What's the significance?
Hi Rick. I would love to see you forcibly married to a horse--but only if you were the passif one in the partnership.

On the evening surf, I laughed along with The Daily Show audience when Oklahoma senator Imhofe was shown holding up a picture of his family of approximately 20 children and grandchildren... with "no divorces" and "no homosexual relationships" among them.

On Nightline, I watched an interview with two cute M0rm0n gay guys who discussed their eventual excommunication. One of them talked about missing the structure and routine of the church, and its plethora of "manuals" that pretty much lay everything out for you so that you "don't have to make a lot of decisions." Wow. I now understand the appeal of joining a cult. I know I've struggled with a lot of decisions.

I don't normally watch Inside Edition, but their story on the Washington State customs officer who stopped the would-be "Millennium Bomber" in 1999 caught my attention. The "reporter" actually used the phrase "evil terrorist." I guess people in trailer parks have even more of a reason to hate Canada now. Thankfully, the capture of al-Zarqawi will distract them.

14 comments:

Jason said...

MR, this will cheer you up immensely.

Crucible said...

Well, you honestly didn't think it would go through, did you? The rationales are certainly lacking, to be sure. Makes me want to be less informed.

Salem said...

I saw that Inside Edition thing too. It was the worst piece of "journalism" I've seen in a while. Absolutely nothing about this weeks' events involved a threat to the US, yet that's how they spun it.
I guess 'Bad guys caught' doesn't scare anybody enough.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

I am so over the children comment. I am not required to bare children. Not required! Stuipd white men are deadly to Congress and the world!

Dead Robot said...

I loved the Daily Show's segment of Bush saying that America was a land of freedoms and rights, cutting back to John Stewart adding "that's why we're curtailing the rights of gays and lesbians. What do you think Mr Scanners Guy?"

Cut to the Explody head Scanners guy.

Kunstemæcker said...

I don't give a shit about their debates.

I don't care who marries. I don't care about marriage.

50 million starving Africans send their sympathy.

Timmy said...

dont burn yo0urself sweetie!

indygirl said...

That Daily Show bit cracked me up too. Do people have no idea how ridiculous they sound when they say that shit?

your judgemental aunt said...

Why do the gays want to get married anyway? I mean all they do is make things pretty to make up for jumping from bed to bed (or in most cases public parks and washrooms) performing filthy ungodly acts that make the baby Jesus cry.

Riss said...

"Oklahoma senator Imhofe was shown holding up a picture of his family of approximately 20 children and grandchildren... with "no divorces" and "no homosexual relationships" among them."

Hee. There's no divorces because they're all having sex with each other. One big happy family.

Dead Robot said...

http://www.crooksandliars.com/2006/06/07.html#a8614

John S slams a fat politician (I really don't know or care who this guy is) with regards to his stupid ideology.

exile said...

what i don't get is why the fuck would you want to get married?

teh l4m3 said...

"Hating Canada is like hating toast!" - Jon Stewart

Adorable Girlfriend said...

YJA: That's why the gays should become Jews. The baby Jesus won't be crying there.

Peter is totally coming to UC's for Passover next year. Upon doing so, he'll let you know about how to work with the Yentas.