Thursday, September 28, 2006

I am cheering and jumping on my couch

I just finished watching Ugly Betty and I think I'm hooked. America Fererra impressed me in a tv movie two years ago (contrary to what Peter might be inclined to believe, I've never seen The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants) and she is beyond lovable as Betty Suarez. This could fill the void left in my life after The Devil Wears Prada!

Consequently, I am screwed on Thursday evenings. I am going to be watching tv for three hours straight: Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, ER.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Hello, Vegas? We would like some more alcohol. Oh, and also, some more beers. Hello? Oh wait, I forgot to dial!

After celebrating Candy's birthday Friday night, I just have one question: how come I didn't get Smart-Served?

I'm an adult, and I take full responsibility for deciding to drink all of Sweden. I realize that in getting a pretty entertainment reporter's name wrong, I made an ass of myself. And not just the regular kind of ass. Getting her mixed up with a reporter on a rival network made me an ass hat. I might as well have called her Tricia Takanawa -- she might have had a less horrified look on her face then.

But seriously, when I fumble my bar order by asking for "an Absolut Mandarin and vodka" -- on two separate occasions -- maybe it's time to offer me just a plain club soda. Ugh.

Friday, September 22, 2006

more objects found by Atlantis

These were spotted in orbit around Uranus:


Ugh. I hate myself for this post.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

I Don't Feel Like Cloggin'

No sir, no cloggin' today.

Despite the fact that I sometimes wonder how anyone can get through all of the "hey lookit what I found on YouTube" posts--no matter how neat and cool they may be--I'm posting the new Scissor Sisters video. I love the relentless catchiness of I Don't Feel Like Dancin' and hope that someday, some man will have cause to say or think these things about me:
I'm gonna be the one who gets it right
I'm gonna tell the whole world that you're mine
The album comes out in Canada in a few days. (My fellow clogger Normlr gave it an advance review last week.) Until then, feast your eyes on the bulging leather pants of Jake Shears:

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

I have something to get off my chest

When I started manscaping in my 20s, I never really had a problem with the dreaded inaugural itch. It was uncomfortable for about a day, and that was it. Ever since, I've followed the Samantha Jones school of pubic hair: it's like a calling card.

A couple of weeks ago, I was bored and decided to clip my chest hair.

It's still itchy and making me meshugena.

How can my chest be more sensitive than my huevos?

Monday, September 11, 2006

this needs to happen

William Shatner should cover "SexyBack" by Justin Timberlake. Clear your mind. Can't you just hear him?

Dirty, babe
You see these shackles? Baby, I'm your slave
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave
It's just that no one makes me feel... this way

Fatrobot, please make us a gif.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

here's to you, Snowflake

All hail Mary-Louise Parker. Weeds wouldn't be the show it is without you.

Note to the Showtime network: what's your damage, Heather? Why can't I look at your goddamned website up here in Canada? I'd love to know more about Weeds... things like music credits. Heck, I might even download wallpaper or an IM icon. But no, I'm stuck with the ghetto site from the Canadian broadcaster. Get with the, um, program. During the run of HBO's Six Feet Under, I was able to explore deep into a show that I adored. Showtime, take a lesson from your rival and unclench, for fuck's sake.