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Showing posts from 2007

Family Guy episode 5ACX21

In the Family Guy episode "Peter's Daughter" (originally aired November 25 2007), Meg is thrilled to receive a Maroon 5 CD from Michael, the med student she's dating. Says Michael: "I remember how you told me you like terrible music, so I thought you might appreciate it." LOVE IT There were many other moments where I howled with laughter... Peter's "Officer Nasty" striptease... the Sanka commercial... ...and this: I LOVE IT SO MUCH! _________________________________________________________ update - November 29 2007, 12:30 a.m. Well, the clip is already yanked from YouTube . Wow, that didn't take Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation long. The clip (all 20 seconds of it) was a spoof of Aliens , with Mike Henry doing his campy best. I understand and respect copyright, and if I headed a major entertainment corporation, I would probably have my staff chase down full-length episodes from sites like YouTube. But a 20-second clip? Th

Don't tase me, bro!

I've had it with electroshock weapons . Members of my family have served the public as police officers, and I know that policing is a demanding, difficult, and dangerous job. But let's not kid ourselves: this is not Star Trek technology, and a Taser® is not a phaser set on stun . (And Dr. Crusher isn't beaming distance away, waiting to offer the services of sickbay.) Since October 14 2007, I have been following the story of Robert Dziekanski with great sadness. Dziekanski was killed when RCMP officers shot him with a Taser at Vancouver International Airport. The government of British Columbia has announced a public inquiry into the events. Amnesty International is concerned about these weapons, and would like their use to be suspended while they are studied more closely. Heather Mallick hits it out of the park on cbc.ca today: He was Robert Dziekanski, who had just made the first plane flight of his life. Unable to speak a word of English, sleepless, dehydrate

hooray

No more sugar rationing! The war is over. Breadlines are a thing of the past! Food is plentiful. TTC tokens become available again! Now that the Toronto Transit Commission price increase has taken effect, commuters can actually buy tokens again. The price has increased to $2.25, but this is a bargain compared to the $2.75 cash fare many riders were forced to pay because of the recent token rationing policy . Those fancy tokens must be made of gold and platinum for the TTC to be so anal about them! "Tokens are expensive to produce … we simply don't have enough if everyone stored 100 at home." - TTC chair Adam Giambrone I am sure that some riders stockpile tokens at the old price. But Giambrone is delusional if he thinks that we all have a few hundred extra dollars lying around to invest in subway tokens. People buy tokens for two main reasons: they can save a bit of money compared to regular cash fare, and they can enter a station via turnstile. (That second featu

kitty

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born: summer 1990 died: October 24, 2007 August 1990 autumn 1990 Christmas 1991 winter 2003 you showed up not long after we did you made Hallowe'en that much more fun you kicked immeasureable amounts of raccoon butt when I was nauseous from new meds and knocked out from dimenhydrinate, I woke to find you curled up in the nook of my arm when S and I were still together, I would wake up sandwiched between the two of you you threw up the night Stephen Harper was elected mice, birds, rabbits, snakes... you were so generous with your gifts thanks for being a great pet... we love you

Tori Amos, Sony Centre, 23oct2007

I just got back from seeing Tori Amos in concert at The Sony Centre with Thistle . This is the 7th or 8th time I've seen Tori live -- I have to go through some shoeboxes, find the ticket stubs, and get an exact tally. What can I say? I love you, Tori (there! I said it on my blog, instead of yelling it out during the show). "Space Dog" sent chills through my body during both of its bridges. And I loved how Pip gave us all the finger after she finished. I'll close with the refrain from the end of Hey Jupiter - The Dakota Version . These lyrics have always blown me away. Tori played it tonight as her final encore. I go from day to day I know where the cupboards are I know where the car is parked I know he isn't you

Family Guy season premiere: chock full of the Schwartz

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I'm still laughing after the season premiere of Family Guy . eventually got over my inner nerd's problem with the "casting" of Herbert as Obi-Wan* loved the Airplane references the scene with Lois/Leia and Cleveland/R2-D2 trying to shoot an mpeg is absolutely brilliant kept wondering when Meg was going to show up. When she appeared as the monster in the Death Star's trash compactor, I totally lost it. * Obi-Wan is such a reverent character... there is almost something disrespectful about Herbert the Pervert in the role. But I realize the show spares no one, and skewers all. That's why I love it.

container-grown carrots

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This spring, I received a free package of carrot seeds as a promotion from a mayonnaise company. I'm an apartment-dweller, and although I'm in a bit of an urban canyon, I have a western exposure and can usually rely on a couple of full-sun hours every day. I've had success in the past growing morning glories, petunias, geraniums, and hibiscus in containers. I had a deep clay pot that I wasn't using, so I planted the seeds in May. The pot is 13" deep and 14½" in diameter at the top: So the question is begged: can carrots be container-grown? Answer: not on my balcony! I probably didn't water them enough. Of the entire seed packet, I only had two plants make it. Containers are quick to dry out on a balcony -- particularly in an urban environment, with winds whipping around buildings. Revel in my bountiful carrot harvest! REVEL IN IT!

preposterous

In Toronto -- a city that is often choked by smog -- there are motorized billboards trolling the streets. I saw one tonight on the way home from work. For a moment, I had to breathe its exhaust. In a world with limited petroleum resources -- and, arguably, a world whose survival is threatened by the continued burning of said resources -- using them to power a moving advertisement is the height of arrogance and environmental short-sightedness. In fairness, the company that runs the billboard I saw tonight claims that some of its fleet is powered by biodiesel . They point out that biodiesel can be made from soybean oil, canola oil, or recycled cooking oil. What they don't mention is that biodiesel often contains regular diesel in a blended format. And I don't care if the truck I was behind tonight was burning 100% biodiesel or 20% biodiesel / 80% diesel... it still stank, it still needs petrochemicals for its lubrication/construction/distribution, and it still takes up va

second date rules

when waiting for a guy to call, the frequency of trivial/annoying phonecalls from your mother increases your apartment is never cleaner than when you are expecting a second date "I would really like to see you again" translates into "I am going to ignore you for a week" "maybe we could get together on Labour Day for coffee" means "you're a monster; fuck off and die" it's all your fault for proactively following up with a phonecall on the tentative second date day the gods will punish you for viewing the world through refreshed, "I have a second date" eyes there is no such thing as a second date in your reality, so this list is shit

not everyone can blog from work

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http://atom.smasher.org http://www.streetsigngenerator.com

internalized homophobia

Last Monday, after I returned to Toronto from a long weekend at my parents' house, I flopped on the couch and watched some television. One of Ontario Travel 's new ads came on -- a 60-second spot featuring Keshia Chanté . Around 42 seconds into the spot, there is a fairly quick 3-shot sequence of some men meeting for gay pride celebrations. That's when I blurted out "oh NO!" to no one in particular. My blink reaction was negative. One of dismay and shame. Basically, homophobic. Where the fuck did that come from? I wondered. I've been thinking about it ever since. I'm proud to live in Ontario, and even more proud that my province was one of the first jurisdictions in the world to uphold the rights of same-sex couples wishing to legally marry . Was it my inner bitch speaking? ("Why did they have to portray young gay men?") Or was it a remnant of my weekend back in the closet, away from the city and the insular nature of my gay neighbour

Swedish 3D puzzle

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I wrote in June that I know how to change a spare tire. Unfortunately, I didn't pay attention to the placement of the tools in the cargo area as I was removing them. After I changed the tire, I just pitched everything back in. A couple of weeks later -- after getting two new tires -- I had a chance to put everything back in its place. I knew the compact spare went in a certain way, and was secured with a threaded disc. What I couldn't figure out was how to get the toolkit (jack, lug wrench, tow eye, etc. all packed in a neat polystyrene form) to fit. No matter how I tried laying it out, I couldn't get the cargo area floor access hatch to close. Consulting the owner's manual was no help. It gave detailed instructions for the sedan, but not my model (the wagon). I pulled up a lawn chair to the back of my car, sat down, and tinkered for an hour. Finally, with my head on the bumper, peering into the cavern of my car's innards, I got it. The polystyrene toolkit l

sweet sweet road justice

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To the driver of the bile-green BMW who got a ticket from the O.P.P. on Monday, August 6, 2007 at approximately 2:50 p.m. -- you should know that I cheered when I saw you pulled over. I'm willing to bet that many other people did, too. You see, when you drive like a total fucking asshole -- pulling out from behind me in the exit lane, accelerate dangerously in a lane you're not supposed to be in, deek back into the exit lane (relying on the ignorant goodwill of a fellow driver who didn't see your underhanded move), then speed recklessly onto the Gardiner Expressway, where you are stopped by the police -- the people whose lives you endanger are only too happy to see you get what's coming to you. If I may further enlighten you, traffic was backed up because the ramp from the southbound 427 to the eastbound Gardiner Expressway was reduced to one lane. Did you not see the bright orange construction signs? How about the orange spray paint on the pavement? Then again, I&

very easily amused

My brother has an infinite ability to crack me up. It's especially pronounced when we're riding in a car -- probably the natural outcome of many long road vacations in our childhood. EXAMPLE 1 "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd is on his satellite radio. He's driving. Neither of us is speaking. OK... Just a little pinprick... There'll be no more -- aaaaaahhh! But you may feel a little sick. And I'm doubled-over, laughing, because he chimes in with a loud, piercing falsetto at the "aaaaaahhh" part. EXAMPLE 2 We're driving again, approaching a stop sign. The highway has rumble strips. As his truck wheels contact the rough surface, resonating with sound pairs (front and back tires) that are further and further apart (we're decelerating), he's adding his own sound effects: mer mer merr merr murrr murrr And I'm laughing again. Every time.

Clematis on Japanese Maple

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Outside my building last night, I noticed one of the clematis vines making a break for it -- creeping onto the branch of a nearby Japanese Maple . I made a note to go back in better light and get a picture for I always win . I went to bed, but couldn't unwind. As 2 A.M. approached, I panicked and took a 'pam . I managed about four hours of sleep, and woke up before my alarm went off. I had some orange juice, and went outside with my digital camera to shoot the clematis. But the plant was in shadow. I took a series of flash and naturally-lit pictures, headed back up to my apartment, put on some coffee, and started to download the images. I had some technical problems, and before I knew it, it was after 7:30. I still had to shower, dress, drive to Sunnybrook for a blood test , then go to work. At the opposite end of the city. On four hours of sleep. The day was full of frustrations like that. I don't normally drive to work, but on my blood test days, public trans

back

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I'm back from the island vacay Sunburned my face but not my vajayjay Don't want to go to work today That was a little poem for you. Here is a picture I took Thursday night:

cottage-surfing

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I'm off work this week. Tomorrow, I'm going up to a coworker's cottage near Sudbury. It's the pink route on the map below. Pink, because it's going to be two gay guys and two lesbians. We're queering it up real nice in the 705 . I'm back on Friday evening. Although I hadn't planned on it, I got a bonus trip to another cottage on Saturday the 14th (red route on map below). It was just an overnight, but it was great. I got to see a former blogger, play some Euchre, and have an eight year-old tell me that I "really don't have a lot of hair." LOLz. Out of the mouths of babes. Toronto, of course, is circled in acid green -- representing a frequent state for our summertime air.

eight: not a good number of spokes

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Skitzzee Mitzzee tagged me yesterday. Eight random facts or habits about yourself . Fack. Thanks Mitz. Since I did a version of this meme in January (see six weird things about me k thx bai), I'm going to refer you to that post, and add two things to it: I have a bad temper. I know, I'm a redhead. Total cliché. Today, I wanted to smash my radio when it played Daughtry. And as a pedestrian, I have been known to hit/kick cars that cut me off or nearly hit me. when it comes to alloy wheels, I like five-spoke the best. I'm not partial to three-spoke or even numbers. Let me illustrate with a selection of pictures! My Saab 9-5 has this type of wheel: This is the 3-spoke that made me decide against the nicer, better-equipped Aero model (plus the fact that I wanted a V6 engine). There's too much open space, and my eye can't reconcile the three spokes and five bolts: Here is a 6-spoke wheel... from a 9-7X (the SUV that Saab doesn't sell in Europe). It l

The more you know...

I saw Toni Collette on tv Friday night, performing at the Live Earth concert in Sydney Australia. I had no idea she could sing. Apparently, she has a band: Toni and the Finish . Last night, I got more proof of her singing ability when a local station aired Connie and Carla . Not the best movie, but alright to have on in the background as I fold laundry. At least I learned something: the etymology of drag . (If Nia Vardalos is right, it's an acronym for "dressed resembling a girl" and originated in Shakespeare. I don't remember that from my Shakespearean English course at university, but then again, the professor was atrocious.) It's never too late to expand your gay horizons. On Saturday, I had sex with a gay trucker. [Strikes item from list.] No, it wasn't in the sleeper cab. I have been preoccupied with a new home computer. Thanks to my friend YJA , I now have a much faster, up-to-date machine. And thanks to my friends Marc and Jason , it'

I'll take it

If all I get is one afternoon with you in a public place... cold bathroom tile followed by coffee and a chat about music... I'll take it -- knowing that you're at home, with your boyfriend, as I write this. I'll take it -- as I look at the naked picture you sent to me years ago (when you were single) and wonder why we never got together. I'll take it -- even though in a few days (or hours), the thought of our encounter will probably send me into a tailspin of loneliness. Which came first: the lowered expectations, or the tendency to process tiny scraps of intimacy as bliss?

want

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I've had a conceptualization lately of want as an electrical circuit: it's either open or closed. On or off. The phrase "I don't know what I want" strikes me as absurd. When you want (or don't want) something, you'll know it. Want is positive or negative, but not neutral. "I don't know what I want for dinner" means you can't decide what to order from the menu. There's a big difference between indecision and want . I want the steak. I don't want the deep-fried parmesan [gag]. Don't say "I don't know what I want to order," but rather, "I can't decide what to order." I tried explaining this to my brother a few weeks ago, and he asked if I had been smoking pot.

flustered

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One of my flaws is that I tend to drop the curve balls life throws at me. Then again, I was never good at sports. "Karen, the gays don't catch." (Grace, in Will & Grace ) Yesterday was a long day for me. Up at 5:30 a.m. and out the door by 6:15 to pick up a coworker, then off to the airport area where we met a bus as part of an organized day trip for our job. The coworker is new, straight, and smokin' hot. I was looking forward to getting to know him. I find out he's of Lebanese descent, and I immediately start picturing this: After a 380 km (round-trip) bus ride and the rest of the day's events, we were back to the meeting point just after 7 p.m. Walking through the parking lot, we see that my car has a flat tire. Not a big problem: there's air in the spare, and I've changed a few tires in my life. Coworker is new to the procedure, so he lends a hand and learns a few pointers from the gay guy. Still, I'm annoyed at the flat and I j

LOL! anthropomorphism!

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I know it's not Caturday , but I couldn't resist ducktoring up this cute image of a duckling chasing an insect. The LOLcats phenomenon has wore down my historical opposition to intentional Internet misspelling. I have a daily belly-laugh at icanhascheezburger . Those crazy kids!

camping in NY state

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For the Victoria Day long weekend (May 19-21 2007), I went with my family on a camping/RV trip to Letchworth State Park . Yes, this was more than a week ago. And yes, I've only just now downloaded my digital photographs. Letchworth simply blew us away. The gorge cut by the Genesee River is, in places, 600 feet deep. The river makes three amazing sets of waterfalls. UPPER FALLS LOWER FALLS My pictures of the middle falls are on 35mm... still undeveloped. I hiked all the way up to the top of the canyon, right underneath the railway bridge (right side) in the first picture. It was a good weekend. The weather wasn't too bad, and I got to try some delicious wine from the nearby Finger Lakes: Salmon Run Petit Noir and Coho Red .

omgTVomgomgOMG

omg lastnight! Lost . I am freaking out. FutureJack is crazed -- kind of like Malcolm McDowell desperate to get back to the Nexus in Star Trek: Generations . omg tonight! Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip returns! Six new episodes. I knew it would come back... I just knew it!

this post is like the mandatory sax solo in an eighties pop song

Expected. De rigueur. Kickin'! What do we do with our lives? We leave only a mark Will our story shine like a light Or end in the dark? Give it all or nothing! doo doo doo doo doo doo doooo doooo... Tina Turner, "We Don't Need Another Hero" Don't you get sad and lonely You need a change from what you do all day Ain't no sense in all your crying Just pick it up and throw it into shape INXS, "What You Need" Always slipping from my hands, Sand's a time of its own Take your seaside arms and write the next line Oh I want the truth to be known Huh huh huh hu-uh huh I know this much is true Huh huh huh hu-uh huh I know this much is -- true Spandau Ballet, "True" Dusty words lying under carpets Seldom heard, well, must you keep your secrets Locked inside, hidden deep from view? Do I seem all that hard? Is it all that tough? Now I've shown you all my cards, well isn't that enough? You can hide your hurt But there'

layer

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I walked home from work this evening. My usual route takes me close to Massey Hall and the Elgin and Winter Garden Theatres .* The paint on the south side of the theatre is peeling off, and it's revealing the brickwork in a way that I find very pleasing. Tonight, the reflected sunlight from a nearby building added an extra layer of interest. Standing on Victoria Street, I took this picture: There it was: through the streetcar wires, dappled in light... a pattern on top of a pattern that made my grumpy mood disappear. * thanks to Salem for the geographical/architectural correction

Forsythia

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I took time to smell photograph the flowers this morning after my medical appointment. Forsythia gives us a jolt of electric yellow just when we really need it. It's in the same family as jasmine and lilac. Guess what else is in the same family? Olives. location: between Sunnybrook Health Sciences Centre and the Vaughan Estate

It's the dirtiest clean I know

I'm heading to HMV after work to buy the new albums by Tori Amos and Feist . Well... definitely Tori, and probably Feist. I'm still getting acquainted with her music. I liked the cool seventies groove of "Inside and Out" after I heard it a few times. (Note to Salem : I didn't know she was part of BSS . I still have no idea who they are, but at least I'm one step closer now.) What might clinch the purchase is how much I love My Moon My Man . I love men, I love men's moons, and I love the foot-tapping tempo of the track. How can I lose?

mobius

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What does one do upon realizing one has ostensibly wasted the last 11½ years of one's life? from Cause and Effect , Star Trek: TNG , season 5

STFU! It's Madame Rouge

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Like OMG. I wish I could blame my absence on FaceTube . But I haven't had any of that Kool-Aid, thank you very much. Nor will I succumb. I would like to address the issue of empire waist dresses . If you are a woman, and you are wearing a dress with an empire waist, I am going to assume that you are with child . They are butt-ugly and unflattering, and should not be worn unless you're pregnant. Do you hear that, Stacy London ? That is all.

he's not fat--he's just right!

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Sorry... I don't have very much time... I'm voting for Joey Fatone after seeing him in Dancing With the Stars . I'm allowed 11 calls from my telephone line. [giggles] This is so unlike me! He's so loveable. Smack that! AW YEAH! 6'1" of pure WOOF . Plus... a great sense of humour, killer smile, gorgeous hair, self-effacing... It's high time I go public with my crush on Joey. He's number nine on my Top Ten List . (I'm in need of a cuddle.)

You are coming to a sad realization. Cancel or allow?

I didn't clog for two weeks. Pablo asked "where do you go when you go away?" I didn't go anywhere, but I got a fuckload of stuff done: I really focused on work, and finally got on top of things exercise (swimming & walking) buttsecks established a healthy sleep pattern uninstalled a hog of a computer security program (rhymes with "Florton") and replaced with a better program... thus preventing me from throwing my computer off the bacony in a fit of frustration saw The Lives of Others . God, I miss Berlin. kept up with household crap like cleaning, dishes, and laundry applied for a new job If I had done all of this stuff plus clogging... well, I couldn't. My sleep would have suffered. And I don't function when I'm sleep-deprived. I have missed the clog camaraderie; sadly, in order to achieve some very pressing goals (new job, weight reduction), something must be extracted from the schedule. I haven't quit the clog. Yet.

blue and green

My favourite colour is green--all shades and hues. I like blue as well, and I find the combination can be calming and beautiful. It probably stems from my childhood, and all the time spent gazing at green forests, blue lakes, and blue sky. My aunt's house had one of those funky room dividers made of hanging strings of beads, and they were blue and green. My mother didn't care for it. "Blue and green should never be seen," she said. No wonder I gravitated toward Martha Stewart as an adult. She made it o.k. to decorate with blue and green. And to match paint to the eggshells of your rare chickens.

French blue

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I first fell in love with French blue in 1998 when I bought a suit at Holt Renfrew . Unfortunately, it did not come with two sets of pants, and eventually, the jacket became an orphan in my closet. I went shopping after work today and found a pair of blue dress pants. I just had a feeling the not-quite-navy pants would match my suit jacket from "Holts." They were on sale, so I bought them. When I got home, I discovered they coordinate perfectly. And I was reminded of my affinity for French blue. Inspired by a tea towel I found at IKEA , I punched up my apartment's cream-coloured 1950s kitchen with French and royal blue a few years ago. Two of the towels are folded and leaning against the bowls in the picture to the left. As you can see from the last picture, I wasn't kidding about my "thing" for the Oregon license plate . And check out the old milk door!

I have a heart on for you

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dating report card for January

I didn't talk about it very much, for fear of offending the gay dating gods. I used phrases like "hung out" with my close friends; I told no one at work. It didn't matter. It got jinxed anyway. I met a cute guy in January and we went out twice. Yes, it originated on a gay hook-up site. No, I did not sleep with him. Yes, he is younger (nine years). Things to be grateful for: he exposed me to the insane brilliance of Robot Chicken . He didn't leave me hanging like the last guy; rather, he did let me know what was going on (eventually). What was going on? He had started to "see someone." I know this might sound very boil-your-pet-rabbit , but dude... I thought that's what we were kind of starting to do. Oh well. Final report: 100% increase in dates over last time! (October 2006, one date. January 2007, two dates.) Progress, not perfection!

wear your long johns

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It's cold outside! But if you dress appropriately, it's not so bad. In this picture, Colton Ford demonstrates the benefits of thermal underwear.

she loaded her babies on that Eastern Air Lines jet and LEFT HIS ASS!

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Tonight, I'm having two girlfriends over to watch Heartburn . They'll be seeing it for the first time. I, on the other hand, have seen it so many times I have themed snacks planned: something approximating mashed potatoes (for the sequence where a depressed Rachel eats them right out of the pot), and key lime pie (which Mark gets in the face near the end). I first suggested screening it when we got together for lunch last fall. Girlfriend A had her man pull a Billy Crudup on her, bailing on the marriage while she was expecting. Girlfriend B just knows I'm nuts about Meryl Streep . I'm so excited, I made a Heartburn collage for y'all:

homesick

In the past few days, three things made me miss home : watching Fargo on Friday night. Minnesota was my border state growing up. helping my brother pull vehicles out of the snowbank on Saturday night. We were on a back road in Grey County , and there were severe snow squalls. My brother was very popular with his 4WD truck, cell phone, and towing knowledge. I was in charge of equipment (tow strap, shovel) and stopping traffic with a flashlight. Helping your fellow motorist is a very northern thing to do. So is knowing how to drive in snowy conditions. at one point yesterday, Toronto's weather was -11°C with 95% relative humidity. I miss the aridity of northwestern Ontario--winter and summer. There's a reason people from western Canada say "it's a dry cold."

OMG yummerz

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Miss Thistle and another friend saw the JT/Pink concert lastnight. Yes, I am jealous! Pink is a badass and I like her for it. Justin Timberlake... well let's just say that I think this is one of his best ass ets: Oh, and I like a lot of his songs, too. And I don't care who knows! Lastnight, I saw Little Children with Peter , Marc , and Jason . It was a real treat to watch such a long movie with so many scenes of Patrick Wilson 's face, smile, eyes, teeth, chest, arms, abs, legs, and ass. Oh, that ass... (Detecting a theme, anyone?)

I'm afraid of becoming "Ba"

"I'm one bad date away from being bitter." - Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City Oh, I've already passed that milestone, I can assure you. What I'm scared of is sliding into the territory covered by Dame Judi Dench 's character Barbara ("Ba") in Notes on a Scandal , which I saw over the weekend. (Fantastic, by the way.) Barbara is bitter, fed-up, and frustrated. She sees an opportunity to take advantage of a naïve new coworker, and uses it to her full advantage. I'm a good person. I don't enjoy hurting others, and strive to do quite the opposite. But on the eve of my 37th birthday--and after six and a half years of being single--I worry about the effects of prolonged disappointment and solitude. In the movie, Barbara reads from her journal: "People like Sheba [ Cate Blanchett 's character] have no idea what it's like to construct an entire weekend around a trip to the laundrette." Are people like Barbara forged as cruel

OMG LOLerz i m SUCH a mess

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I found another book in the laundry room of my apartment building this week. What can I say? I saw "Betty White" and was immediately drawn to it. However, I promptly got all verklempt when I read the jacket. The book is about Tom Sullivan 's guide dog, Dinah. When she got too old to do her job, Betty White adopted her. ...when Dinah reached the age of eleven, she began to lose her edge. Her eyes were no longer as sharp, her step not as sure. The once-assured guide dog became defensive and hesitant. Although Tom hated the idea of working with any dog but Dinah, it seemed to be his only choice, and [a new guide dog] joined the family. Dinah, however, was not ready to settle back into a life of leisure [...] while an interloper took over her job and her master. She stopped eating, began hiding away, and simply gave up on life. Yet Dinah's story has a whole new beginning... and her name is Betty White. Oh, believe me, I was nearly in tears when I read the fina

this is my reward

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I wasted a couple of hours last night trying to update clog. Here's what I got: This is what I get for trying. I didn't see a notice about any scheduled outage. Perhaps Blogger can let us know when the system is available . Then, we can just assume that it's down the rest of the time. Even Haloscan was being shitty last night. I tried 5x to leave a comment chez Butch .

six weird things about me

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Last month, Riss tagged me with a meme. Yes, I'm just getting to it now. You may find it hard to believe, but it took a while for me to put together a list of six weird things about me . When I'm making a sandwich, the mustard cannot touch the cheese. I'm 6'4" but unless I hit my head on something, I usually go through the day not realizing how tall I am. I also "get the picture" when I see tall actors (like Tom Selleck, Vince Vaughn, or John Corbett) on television or in a movie dwarfing the people they're next to. I am terrified of submerged objects. The idea of a reef or a shoal is really scary to me. I grew up around water and know my way around a boat... perhaps it's a healthy fear. I find it extremely difficult to fall asleep without white noise (fan, air conditioner, etc.) and three pillows. (I'm a side-sleeper: one pillow goes under my head; the second underneath whatever arm is the upper arm; the third goes between my knees.

twenty-five

Happy birthday to Steven at Human Nature . Steven was freaking out a bit earlier this week at the prospect of turning twenty-five. It's a milestone birthday, no doubt. Quarter-century. Twenties half over. I must have been thinking these things when I turned 25, because I: went out with Peter and Jason , and drank too much had a lap dance at Remington's later on the dance floor at Club Colby's, made everyone smell my finger (it was stripper perineum, not ass... I swear to God) wound up at the tubs, where there was a big lineup (for rooms and lockers) started talking to the guy beside me, who asked what I had done that Monday night found out it was his birthday, too asked him if he wanted to get out of line and go back to my place back at my apartment, I actually carded him to see if he shared my birthday (which he did) blew him in front of my kitchen sink, then sent him home went to class the next day with a massive hangover Do it up in style, Steven. You young pup,

Santa might suspect I'm gay

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Last year, it was decorative push pins: This home organizer was in my stocking on Christmas eve 2006. It's very flowery. Who plays Santa during Christmas? No, it's not Peter . It's my mother. And another year has gone by without a long-overdue discussion . Is praying for death an option? How about a coma?

Etobicoke Hydro

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There are communal libraries in the laundry rooms of my apartment complex. (Some of Peter's gag gifts and books have ended up there--but they never last long!) A couple of weeks ago, I pulled a copy of Valley of the Dolls from the shelf and found something neat tucked inside: a mailer from Etobicoke Hydro . From the font, I thought it might date back to the 1950s. Some web searching revealed that the mayor listed on the card served from 1967 to 1972. It's not as old as I thought. Business Reply Mail was 8 cents, and there's no postal code. Etobicoke was one of six former boroughs of the Municipality of Metropolitan Toronto. Etobicoke Hydro later became part of Toronto Hydro , and Metropolitan Toronto was amalgamated into the City of Toronto in 1998.

I watch Discovery Channel too much

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...because I'm crushin' on Tory Belleci from Mythbusters and Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs . Tory is smart and funny. His smile kills me. Mike Rowe... manly, strappin', and one helluva sexy voice. Yeah, I watched me some television on Saturday. And lastnight, I watched Super Size Me on CBC . I had always wanted to see it, but knowing that Morgan Spurlock spews in it made me want to make sure I had control of the volume. (I always mute barf scenes, and usually look away from the television.) It's funny: despite having seen Spurlock and Rowe projectile vomit on the small screen, I still find them eminently attractive.