Tuesday, August 07, 2007

sweet sweet road justice

To the driver of the bile-green BMW who got a ticket from the O.P.P. on Monday, August 6, 2007 at approximately 2:50 p.m. -- you should know that I cheered when I saw you pulled over. I'm willing to bet that many other people did, too.



You see, when you drive like a total fucking asshole -- pulling out from behind me in the exit lane, accelerate dangerously in a lane you're not supposed to be in, deek back into the exit lane (relying on the ignorant goodwill of a fellow driver who didn't see your underhanded move), then speed recklessly onto the Gardiner Expressway, where you are stopped by the police -- the people whose lives you endanger are only too happy to see you get what's coming to you.

If I may further enlighten you, traffic was backed up because the ramp from the southbound 427 to the eastbound Gardiner Expressway was reduced to one lane. Did you not see the bright orange construction signs? How about the orange spray paint on the pavement? Then again, I'm willing to bet you knew that perfectly well. You just decided that your time was more valuable than everyone else's, and acted accordingly.

Either that, or you were about to shit your pants, just trying to get home. In which case, I hope you soiled yourself. Prick.

16 comments:

Adorable said...

I love when asshole drivers get what is coming to them!!!

Love it.

Elmo said...

Sorry rouge...but I got out of the ticket. I actually did shit my pants and the officer couldn't stand the smell...

Snooze said...

hehehheheh - sometimes there is sweet justice.

Steven said...

You said BMW, right? Good.

I thought you were talking about me driving like a maniac in my Lexus.

Dead Robot said...

What did you do to piss off this guy? Everyone knows that BMW drivers are courteious, safe and fair!

SharkBoy said...

Great... another one who'll come line-up at the Court of Justice, yell at the counter clerk because the line-up is too long, complain about having to fill out the myriad of forms necessary to request a court date, complain about the fact that it will take 8 months to get that date, miss the court date, come back to the huge line-up to re-open his file, complain about the wait, and then 2 yrs later has his case thrown out of court because the cop has retired...

SharkBoy said...

But on the other hand, I'm happy the cops are doing their job, and even sweeter in your particular case.

Jason said...

My drive back was a nightmare. The driver (will remain nameless) could not stay between the lines for his lane. I'm not exaggerating when I say we almost got into an accident 3-4 times. Milton asked him "which side of our lane should we have our accident in?"

Pablo said...

He probably shat. I just wanted to type that word.

tornwordo said...

I hope he got a really bad one like "reckless driving". Asshole.

Miss Thistle said...

Comeuppance! Loves it.

Butchie the Minx said...

Hells yeah!

sirbarrett said...

That's one plate of justice served!

Mitzzee said...

lmao at jason.

mloyd you fucking go boy.
lmao at you too.

Phronk said...

This is the feel-good post of the year.

On the way to TO the other day, I saw a guy in a van driving half on the left shoulder, half on the road, for no apparent reason. It wasn't a mistake, as he did this for about 20 minutes. It's not like he was even doing it selfishly...just senselessly.

Marc said...

damn kids