Thursday, April 20, 2006

to the gay guy on the 509/510 to Union Station, evening of 4/19/2006

(subtitle: too much self-confidence)



we all heard you talking

"Omigod! I can't stand her! She's so trailer-park!"

"yip yip gay yip
bla gay bla bla
like like like flaming"

some of us continued to hear you talking on the subway platform at Union

some of us were quite far away

your hairdo made your head look like it had just been pulled from a birth canal

nice Von Dutch purse

it sure was bright down there in the subway, wasn't it?
good thing you had your jLo shades

oh, and Vinnie Barbarino called
he needs his jeans back

if you saw me staring, it was just because I was willing (with my imagination, à la Joan Allen's character in The Upside of Anger) your head to explode, or for you to trip on your Euro-techno-sneakers and fall in front of the train

the driver would've had to activate the windscreen wiper

it would have been decidedly not "glam"

30 comments:

R2K said...

: )

Crucible said...

Brilliant, I love this. Keep the claws fully extended.

Natasha said...

Easy boy! You're too cute.

Jason said...

Say: Gay Pride.

toobusyliving said...

SNAP!!

You're "glam glam..blah.."

sirbarrett said...

Ouch! Nice diatribe. Was he eating a bowl of fruit?

Shora said...

I love catty.

indygirl said...

Glam slam.

toobusyliving said...

You should have just said this.

Carrie said...

lmao at mleter.

Anonymous said...

Only emphasizes your own homophobia.

Butchieboy said...

Quit gay-bashing, dude.

madamerouge said...

Um, yeah, whatever. I'm not homophobic; I'm poseur-phobic.

And while I'm at it, anonymous... grow a pair and leave your name, whoever you are.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous is right.

- different Anonymous

your judgemental aunt said...

The term "Jaded Queen" comes to mind.

Go buy a pair of Diesel jeans, you'll feel better. I promise.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

You get down with your bitchy caddy self, doll.

tornwordo said...

I can't stop laughing about the yip yip gay bla bla flaming quote.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous posters are jerks.

- yet another Anonymous person.

Kunstemæcker said...

bah. some people.

Anonymous said...

I liky bitchy mloyd posts! keep it up! fack, is it 5 yet??

jooles

Butchieboy said...

Dude, does anonymous not know that you are like the gayest dude, ever?

MrsViddy said...

I wouldn't go back to my twenties for anything! I loved your post -- the voice of the urban poet.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous may not be so anonymous. Anonymous may be pulling MR's chain.

-Anonymous

Dead Robot said...

Was he carrying a dog?

I'm all for sexual equality, just don't call me homophobic (or my favorite laughable one: "self hating") if I find your high pitched attention starved rants equally annoying regardless if you had a cunt or a dick.

r-e-n spells ren but i'm raw said...

the thing about the email addy removal is as soon as someone responds to an older message you comes right back

madamerouge said...

No dog, dead R. And... word.

George Larson said...

Sorry to be late to the scene on this one! Jeebus that is funny.

Mme. Rouge is totally homophobic! I knewd it all along.

Anonymous said...

Stand arms length and point your fingers on both hands at them and think... "I'm giving you cancer with my mind...I'm giving you cancer with my mind..."

Very South Park but effective.

car@ said...

I dun care , madame is still a sweet guy! would never imagine... ;-)

Normlr said...

Sounds like someone needed a bitchslap. Bet the whole outfit was comprised of knock offs too.

Don't even get me started on the uber fags.....